#i want to make him as much as a cryptid as i possibly can

[shrimpwizards]

slime time!!! + headcanons (y juevos)

[enkays-den]

Enkay Watches the Imp and Skizz Podcast #127 (featuring @joehills)

First of all, if you are not watching Joe Hills on either youtube or twitch, DO IT!!!! He's streaming pretty much every day and the conversations are always so interesting and he has the best little windows into the workings of Hermitcraft. Folks will pop by and have super interesting conversations with him! He's one of my favorite hermits and I think his unique way of experiencing minecraft, life, and hermitcraft is something that deserves more eyes on it, because I know people are sleeping on him.

First off, THIS is how you show up to the Imp and Skizz Podcast! Classy, on brand, and unique!

I love Impulse's little nest of pillows, he's so cozy nestled in there, holding his mandated amount of water like a security blanket

I love that the reason they wanted Joe on was to talk about the coup SPOILERS: they never even touch on it

joe's dad being a logician makes so much sense tbh

"a creationist universe where god wants you dead and i play minecraft like a greek hero idiot" is such an amazing way to talk about super hostile maps

HOW IS IT THAT JOE AND SKIZZ BOTH HAVE EDGAR ALLEN POE ANECDOTES OFF THE DOME

Joe having his wedding taking place during the recess of a vehicular manslaughter trial feels so strange and yet so Joe

JOE HILLS FULL NAME DROP?????

"YOU'VE GOTTA BE JOE KING" okay he mentioned on stream that there was a joke that maybe two people would get and I will proudly claim to be one of the two.

"fighting to become an artist" is so validating to Skizz's journey so far. It's gonna be his year anniversary of being a hermit soon and im gonna get emotional about his path this last year

Joe WOULD put on the Scottish Parliament sessions as background noise, love that

"I don't trust any platform with my art. I'm the one that makes the art and the audience is the one that appreciates my art" "I need to be as platform/brand agnostic as possible" "next time Amazon does something terrible to the unions" 👏👏👏

CHEERS REFERENCE, SKIZZ'S SITCOM BRAIN IS ACTIVATED

talking about his streams like a bar and like,,,,, he's so smart about the role of creators and fandom and i just appreciate joe so much

it's funny that they're shocked about the relationships can be formed within fandoms when like,,,,, that's how they met tango

((also if we talk regularly and read this i love you guys <3))

skizz, the worst chat reader ever i love you

i need hermitcraft standup. please. custom texture snowballs as tomatoes or flowers to throw

thinking about a younger skizz using a tape recorder to record his 'genius ideas' and quotes he likes and annoying the crap out of his friends

YES JOE AND SKIZZ TALKING ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF COMEDY AND THE STRUCTURE, THEY'RE SUCH AN INTELLECTUAL DUO

I'm glad that we got to hear Joe's JFK impression

COURT CASE TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Bdubs will only let Doc win if it's funnier for doc to win, because that's how guilty doc was"

Joe quoting Sun Tsu and then going on the stand and said "Your Honor, Your Highness, my client is a baby" in an asymetric star trek dress, that's the Joe Hills Difference

"DELICIOUS" skizz i love how schadenfreude you are

"FIVE DIAMONDS PER F TIER BOOK???" impulse my favorite wet cat

"I'll make one sale every two months" and also implying that the shopping district has property taxes

the delivery on "two. some people say four" was SLICK

TUMBLR MCYT SEXYMAN POLL MENTION

"tumblr defines sexyman to mean 'most bizarre, cryptid, creepy thing' " not wrong there.

"well scar is obviously going to win the sexyman competition"

"once i found out that it's for weird, cryptid energy, I knew "oh nevermind I'm gonna win this"

joe hills is my favorite weird guy and he deserved to win

cleo as our nonbinary icon placing third place in the tumblr sexyman poll

All in all, fantastic podcast, and not long enough imo. I hope Joe gets to be there in person one day like he originally envisioned, and there's just an untapped well of information that could go into future podcasts

Reminder that you should subscribe and follow Joe!

BONUS, edited by me, please credit if you use it, I HIGHLY ENCOURAGE you to use it (original screencap under cut):

[revelboo]

Your most recent installation of Bad Idea has me screaming. Love all your portrayals of the characters, esp cryptid slenderbot.

Thank you! I have a lot of fun writing these

Bad Idea Pt 12

TFP Soundwave x Reader

• That little hitching noise you make as he adjust his tendril about you sinks into him. Almost scandalous with the desire to see if he can coax that sound from you again. Knowing he should stop before things get too out of hand, but tempted to keep going even knowing this isn’t meant for him. That he doesn’t deserve to ask for this when you give him so much already. Graspers still holding those small wrists, the skin contact strengthens that connection to you, letting you spill into him processor until he’s almost drowning in you, your thoughts and emotions. Your need sparking through him until he needs more.

• Shuddering against his hold, you bite into the inside of your cheek. He can’t possibly know what he’s doing to you, and you know you need to stop him before you come apart to that lovely friction and embarrass both of you. But you want to pretend it’s intentional, that he does know. Almost whimpering as his head tips closer and his other tendril coils about you, lifting you off your feet. Seeing your own flushed face in his visor as one of the other tendril’s graspers brushes your bottom lip. “Please,” you protest, not sure of you’re asking him to stop or keep going, body trembling as he watches you. Probably not understanding why you’re trembling, but then he’s so tactile that of course he’s going to keep doing it out of curiosity. Armor panels lifting slightly when you rock yourself against the coil of his tendril when it slides against you. Knowing you’re going to be absolutely mortified later about grinding against him like a teenager in the backseat of a car, but unable to care right then.

• Stroking over him, the way you say his name in that breathy whisper of need curls about his spark. Fascinated with those little noises and knowing they’re because of him. For him. Frame bowing over you, servos splayed on the surface he’s holding you suspended over. Wants to see you come apart for him, hear his name on your lips, a plea or a curse, he doesn’t care. Just wants this. A hand sliding over his chassis, long servos stroking over himself, reaching to free his spike as you arch in his grip with a ragged gasp. The connection flaring as more of your thoughts seep into him. Feeding his own need. “Soundwave.” That harsh, snarling recording of Megatron’s voice brings his head snapping up. Finding Lazerbeak staring at him in open disapproval. Reminding him of his duties. Venting roughly, he reluctantly eases you down and retreats. Struggling to get himself back in control.

• You’re going to kill that stupid turkey. Butt hitting the cold, metal surface as he, Soundwave, draws back, his head tips up toward big bird, and you almost want to cry, because you’d been so close. But you finally have a name for him, though, he couldn’t have just left you both alone a little bit longer? No, because he hates you. Running a shaky hand over your face as you try to calm your racing heart feeling the embarrassment now that the high is out of reach. Shooting you a look that you’re almost certain is smug, the drone docks against Soundwave and he reaches out a servo to touch your cheek. And just leaves you there more frustrated than you’ve ever been in your entire life as you watch him go out the door and want to call after him. Beg him to come back and finish what he started.

• Putting some distance between himself and temptation, he can feel Lazerbeak’s annoyed disapproval spilling into his processor. Can still feel the visceral ache of your need and desire humming through him even as he loses the feel of your mind tangled in his with distance until you’re just a warm, frustrated buzz in the back of his processor. He’d been so close to giving in, mass shifting and taking what he needs, wanting to lose himself in the feel of another’s body and mind. To forget the past just for a short time and only feel. And he hates himself for that, because Lazerbeak is a constant reminder of all of his failures, the ones he hadn’t been able to save. Knows happiness isn’t meant for him no matter how much he wants it. That you’re not meant for him.

Previous

Next

[supernova41st]

Can I request tf2 mercs with a reader who is genuinely terrifying. Like there quiet, sneaky, uncanny, basically reader is kinda like the mercs very own cryptid. (Bonus points if reader is tall af<3)

Boo 🤍

A/n: Spy’s is a little short here 😣 I hope you weren’t too eager to see his lol. I got a little experimental with this one, not too much tho. Also I’ll be going on another break, I know I just finished one but I’m going through an unexpected rough time rn. So sorry guys, hope you enjoy <33

Warnings: Video used may be a spoiler for s2 of scream queens, Praying is used in a humorous light

To start things off, you introduced yourself in the worst way possible. The bus that you were supposed to take got broken down so you had to find your way through the base without knowing where the entrance was. So what’d you do? Bang into a bunch of glass windows at 3am while it was RAINING. Some of the mercs were up trying to fix up the power generator and..

I saved that clip for weeks I’m so happy I have a reason to use it now

I know they’re all supposed to be big bad mercs but you scared the living FUCK out of them.

Scout

This man went running. He went all the way from the generator to the fucking bunks in the span of a minute! So what’d he do when he got to his room? He grabbed his cross necklace, got on his knees, and started PRAYING.

“Please god Jesus frickin’ Christ hear my prayers, save me-I’m sorry about all those magazines I keep under my bunk and I’m sorry that I told spy to go fuck himself when he told me I couldn’t pull bitches and I’m sorry I call girls bitches please just don’t let me friggin’ die dude!!”

He just kept chanting the same things until Miss Pauling found him cradling himself on his bed with a blanket wrapped around him.

“Scout what are you doing?”

“THERE IS A GHOST IN THE BASE.”

“Oh, you mean y/n?”

‘Hi 👁️‍🗨️👁️‍🗨️’

Yea he was pretty freaked out by you. To make it worse, you always just stare at him. He can’t remember a single moment where he looked at you and didn’t catch your tiny pupils locked onto him.

At first he’d just gently wave awkwardly while you did the same so freakishly. Eventually he decided to say something because it was scaring him, something he’ll never admit

“Yo you got a problem or somethin’, what’s with all the stares?”

“Nothing, I just like looking at you. Your structure pleases me.”

“..oh, well that’s actually-wait I thought-hold on do you really-pfft-Yeesh, I didn’t expect you out of everyone to haha.. Yknow”

Yeah he was blushing like crazy, such a straightforward compliment.

He’s still scared of you, but he uses you as his hype man every now and then. He’ll fish for compliments and WILL receive them

“Dontcha think I got some nice racks for a guy?”

“..Totally”

He could literally walk up to you and threaten to kill you and your reaction is just “yuh go for it”

If you’re freakishly tall then he calls you tree. Cuz

If you’re on the shorter side then he would just pick you up from the shoulders and kiss you on the forehead. He knows you won’t do shit, you’re literally just 🧍‍♀️

(gotg reference)

“I am hideous? :(“

“You kiddin’? You’re horrifying to look at”

Engineer

He didn’t even notice everyone else went running, he just kept on working on the electrical box. So when he stood up and saw you staring straight into the glass, he jumped a little but was mostly just confused

“What in the..”

“tap tap-Can you let me in?”

You’re lucky he didn’t go running like everyone else, you probably would’ve died from the flu if you spent another second outside in the freezing rain.

He puts a bell on you. He just had one laying around and tied it around the your wrist, it didn’t work because of how stiff your movements were so to ‘help’ you rang it against his ear.

“..”

“…..🔔🔔🔔🔔”

“GOD DAMN IT- oh, y/n”

“Sorry, the bell wasn’t ringing how you wanted it to so I rang it myself”

“Uh-huh, thanks for the warning partner”

From my experience southern people love to make conversation, but you aren’t really familiar with that. So when he tries to flirt it gets pretty awkward

“How’s it goin’ sugar, I reckon your looking quite nice today”

“👁️‍🗨️👁️‍🗨️”

“..you gonna say anythin’ back?”

“Oh, um.. I like your face.”

“Woah, alright then.”

He feels so embarrassed when he stands next to your tall ass, it makes him feel belittled. Especially when you actively have to look down just to make eye contact

But if you’re short then he loves it. Finally for once he doesn’t have to be reminded of his height when standing next to anyone.

Spy

He’s gone as soon as you show up. Like straight up disappears. He doesn’t like to show fear-makes him look weak

He’s convinced you could still see him though, cuz you happen to look in his direction even while he was invisible.

You don’t scare him as much as the others, if anything he took a bit of a liking to you because you stressed him out the least compared to the others. He always stood next to you + you were always his first pick for missions

You always make small talk with him. He doesn’t enjoy it but he still responds

“What is under your mask?”

“That is none of your business.”

“Why? Do you look like me?”

Spy doesn’t know if he should feel offended or annoyed

You don’t necessarily startle him like everyone else but you do make his heart jump slightly when you pop out of nowhere, you can see it in his pupils but never his body.

Pyro

HE RAN TOO BUT DIDN’T KNOW WHY LMFAO

He just saw everyone running and went ‘oh okay we’re doing this now 🏃‍♂️’

But seriously, he fell in love with you at first sight. Your features felt so intricate to him, you always gave each other blank stares, zoning into each other’s eyes.

‘⚫️ ⚫️’

“👁️‍🗨️👁️‍🗨️ hi”

“⚫️ ⚫️ mmf”

You’re the only person who can fully understand him. No, not using his body language, you can actually tell what he’s saying. He aw’s at that, finally someone knows what he’s saying.

It makes him more self aware than how he was before, he’ll say some really petty shit and when you react he panics

“Mmph mmm”

“um pyro I need you to calm yourself”

“Mm!”

Somehow you disturb HIM, you’ll point something out to him and talk to him like he’s crazy which makes him crazy

“Pyro, you reek of fire, it’s 30° outside, and it’s a cease day. Do you have any thoughts?”

“Mmmf mmm mph ☹️”

*plz leave me alone

Since you and him are so observant, the rest of the mercs are a little spooked by you guys. You’ll be in the corner with him watching and everyone is fairly weirded out.

“Mm mmmfmm mm”

“Pyro you’re hilarious.”

“What did thing say?”

“He said that if you were a littlest pet shop figure you’d be #508”

“..heavy is not sure what he expected”

[revalition]

OCT 8 - VOLITION

Hold yourself together. Keep your Morale up.

I had to resize this image 3 times to get tumblr to take it... it is also past midnight here, but the day change doesn't really count if I haven't gone to sleep yet, so :)

Volition. My love. my favourite skill. please enjoy. I also drew the volitions of some of my mutuals!! because I love you guys and your volitions very much (holding them gently in my hands). hopefully you guys dont mind and I didn't mess them up too badly

anyway. uhm. I'm much too tired to write anything super coherent right now. please write tags for me or write comments so I can see them when I wake up haha

and! there is a LOT under the cut. like, way more than any of the other days. it is giant. be very careful expanding it <3

ok here goes... I'm typing shorter ones out and screenshotting big ones

--------

VOLITION - Stop, you're only making it worse for him -- you never help with *anything*.

- Rare volition being rude to other skills!!! it only happens under pressure, too

KIM KITSURAGI - "What else could she have done? Lie? She saw there was no way to lie and get away with it."

DRAMA - You would have caught it.

VOLITION - Like hell you would have -- remember?

- you tell him volition!!

SUGGESTION - What is *wrong* with you? Why did you ask to be connected to her? Who *does* that?! Act professional now.

VOLITION - *You* told him to do that stupid thing...

- rare volition callout!!

YOU - Can I trust that guy?

VOLITION - A little. They're all still of limited use, interpreting things to the best of their ability. Maybe they add flair or something? I wouldn't know. I don't add flair.

- this is one of my favs haha. you don't need flair, love, it's ok

VOLITION - Ouch.... That's like twenty points of pride-damage right there, buddy.

- This is after Sylvie turns you down to get coffee. (and you do suffer a point of morale damage haha). him calling you buddy is so funny. it's always mildly condescending too!

- here's the other two:

VOLITION - You're no titan of Volition, buddy. He's got you in a fork. Sit down or leave.

VOLITION - You're a little more moralist now, buddy. A little more *normal*. Even if you didn't want to be.

YOU - "Cryptid extravaganza? I like the sound of that."

KIM KITSURAGI - "And I *don't*. Just one."

VOLITION - Or he'll be *disappointed* in you.

ENCYCLOPEDIA - Whooh... tough choice there.

- volition knows it's truly the most terrible thing haha

VOLITION - An enormous expenditure of willpower to build up strategic semen reserves? You had me at *willpower*. Let's do it!

ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Life is all about pleasure... why deny it?!

- these two are hilarious. poor echem. but also volition, honey, nono...

- the game implies consequences when increasing your skills too high but you don't see it with all of them. Volition's one you don't really see much downside to, but you can just. Imagine it here. Him pressuring you to do something stupid, just for the sake of it being difficult. Surely that's not healthy??

- I do think Volition has a lot of issues. I'll get into some more of them later though!!

- but just... Harry wanting to do something that *is* a test of willpower and Volition is completely uninterested. But the semen retention thing is okay? sigh

- and then after that, he's just like. nope. we're not going to not swear :)

- he's so stupid sometimes. also it's absolutely hilarious to me that you can pick the "..." option over and over and Volition will match it forever. You simply cannot out-will your own willpower. It's just not possible.

- I actually live for Volition being the singular voice of reason. Look at the others all chiming in!!

- this one too, Volition being the only one trying to stop it! Why are they all piling on?? Composure not you too >:(

- I had excessively high Volition *and* Pain Threshold in my first run and the two of them!!! PT gets very self destructive at high levels, so seeing the relentless push and pull of PT and Volition was so good.

- This line from the description -> "Cool for: Sane People, Well-Adjusted Cops, The Non-Suicidal" yes it's cool for them, sure, but it's incredibly!!! important for NOT these people! Because Volition doesn't make you sane, or well-adjusted, or non-suicidal. He's just the one voice of reason in there trying to veer you away from making irreversibly bad decisions.

VOLITION - She tries to hide it, but some *great doubt* is spreading within her. There is a crown slowly cracking above her head.

- I need to talk about this line. Just. Volition acknowledging the existence of Joyce's own Volition (which he refers to as a crown!!!) cracking! the *great doubt* spreading and cracking apart the crown! hghh I live for any and every depiction of volition cracking apart when morale gets low and this is absolutely one of them.

AUTHORITY - Weren't you warned to *not* go down this path?! And yet you *still* go and do it...

VOLITION - Just because you *can* doesn't mean you *have to* say everything that comes to mind. Back out before the situation escalates.

- these two's dynamic is very funny to me. I love when they work together (but I also love when they fight! fight fight fight!)

VOLITION - Don't ask, don't look, don't do *anything* here. Just go away. Get back to work.

- "Just go away" ugh my guy is fighting for his life here to get you away from the cigarette and alcohol counter in the Frittte

- hghhk Volition. this is a Challenging passive check too (the second one, to hang up). *one* chance, that's all he has in him. It's not possible at all in the dream, no matter how high your Volition stat is. It's just not something he can do. But here, with the distance of the payphone between you and possibly real consequences, he's able to manage one chance.

- (also did anyone see the post about the payphone conversation possibly being entroponetic crosstalk?? I could talk about that for way too long. but I am getting sidetracked)

YOU - "Yeah, I'm done talking about her. I don't want to think about her anymore."

RHETORIC - What a strange choice of words...

EMPATHY - Caustic, overflowing with negativity.

VOLITION - That can't be healthy. What's happening here? Why do you keep coming back to this window?

YOU - Nothing, everything's okay.

VOLITION - But it isn't. And you shouldn't come back to this anymore. This should be the last time. Stop talking about that damn window, please.

- this one too

VOLITION - Throw it away. Please.

- I need to talk about this. Volition dutifully directs you away from all the reminders of Dora. He does everything in his power to stop the final dream from happening.

- And I get it. He's trying to protect Harry. Because Harry isn't mentally stable right now and it could endanger the case. but... at least, when the final dream happens Kim is (usually) there when you wake up. And if all went well, you get to go back to your precinct, and take Kim with you. And Harry has support.

- If the dream doesn't happen... it will happen eventually. There are a million reminders in Martinaise in the span of a week, imagine what Jamrock is like. It's an inevitability. And then you're taking the chance that the dream happens at a time when Harry is much worse off. Maybe he's alone. Maybe Kim left, maybe he was let go from the force.

- The dream could happen at a better time too, of course. we probably all imagine harry picking up the pieces after martinaise and his life finally taking a turn for the better. and I imagine this is what Volition had in mind, by delaying the dream. Maybe it can be delayed for a long time, long enough.

- but it's a huge risk and I just... don't know if he's making the right choice here. keeping important information about Harry's past, which has shaped his relationships and life considerably, in a box so it can't hurt him

- yeah. anyway...

YOU - What if I don't want to ask questions?

REACTION SPEED - You're a cop, Harry. It is *unnatural* of you not to want to ask questions.

VOLITION - You don't have to. No one is forcing you to be a cop.

- Volition??? sometimes this guy makes no sense, he's so funny. I really think he occasionally just does something for the sake of being defiant

EGG HEAD - "Please. Please?" The young man smiles at you widely, bright and innocent as the summer sun.

VOLITION - His pleaful smile is disarming, but you can withstand it's glorious assault, if you just put your heart into it.

- why? why?? don't turn down egg head ever!

VOLITION - Alright, come on now. If *he* hasn't said anything about your lack of pants, no one will. You're only hurting yourself by not wearing them...

- this one is so funny. I love that he lets you know he *knows* you're trying to get a reaction and you're not going to get one!!

- yes volition, stop himmm

ELECTROCHEMISTRY - How very astute of you! This renders it ineffectual. You should look for a *whole* cigarette. Or better yet -- an entire pack! Strike that, a CARTON! Make sure they're all healthy and able-bodied, then smoke them all.

VOLITION - Or -- you could *not* do that. No one is making you.

- volition as usual trying to stop you from picking up bad habits... I just love the way he talks. he's not even telling you not to, just voicing his disapproval in a rather passive way

INTERFACING - Wow, the gods of mass production have made this alcohol container *laughably* easy to open. A child could have done it.

VOLITION - I don't know about this...

- he still doesn't outright tell you not to drink it... :(((

ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Fine. We're not worried... you'll crawl back to this bottle soon enough. We'll give you another chance. Booze *always* gives you *another* chance.

SUGGESTION - Yes, it's *merciful* that way. It's your friend. Come back to it, we're all rooting for you to.

VOLITION - Not *all* of us...

- he's the only one rooting for you to not drink it!! he can't stop you. but he is supporting you in the only way he's able.

VOLITION - No. You *can* stop. Just wade through the hell. Month after month. Year after year -- you against the nothingness. It's possible, because *time* is possible.

- He can encourage you!!

YOU - "I *will* stop drinking."

MEASUREHEAD - "THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE. THE GAME OF *SHAH-MAT* YOU PLAY AGAINST THE GUL'S TRICKS IS UNWINNABLE. THE DAYS, THE WEEKS, THE MONTHS WILL WEAR YOU OUT. THE OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP IS INCAPABLE OF LONG TERM LUCID THOUGHT."

VOLITION - NO.

- volition!!! <3 that's all he needs to say.

HORRIFIC NECKTIE - This is it. I'm gonna hit the ground and burn away now. Most of the people in this yard are gonna die -- if not all. Probably you too. It's a COMPLETE DISASTER.

PAIN THRESHOLD - Get ready for a world of pain, man.

VOLITION - No. Not a disaster. Weave this into the story of you. Walk out of its *ruins*. Save those who still can be saved -- *I'm* on your side.

ESPRIT DE CORPS - And the lieutenant too. And the men behind your back, drawing their weapons... you can live. You can get out of this.

- hnngh. this one is among my favourites too. my amazing 1 int run also had 1 motorics. at this point I had failed the rhetoric check to save ruby, failed the logic check to save lizzie, and now failed the spirit bomb throw too and was about ready to cry. Volition's quiet reassurance was very important to me in that moment. EdC too, and I did save Kim.

HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Your hand trembles as you scratch at your cheek... oh no, that's not how a grown man shaves!

YOU - Leave it for now.

HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Thank god, I would have cut your throat.

VOLITION - The centipede is exaggerating -- people don't actually cut their own throats when they're shaving. At least not accidentally.

- centipede!!! it's such a funny nickname. alternatively

HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Your hand trembles as you scratch at your cheek... oh no, that's not how a grown man shaves!

YOU - This isn't sharp enough. Scrape harder.

HAND/EYE COORDINATION - Stop, for crying out loud! You're gonna cut your own throat.

VOLITION - There's no way to salvage this.

- these guys are hilarious. why is volition even watching this mess? 'there's no way to salvage this.' ??? I'm not even sure if he's referring to you or H/E... he must be so tired.

ENDURANCE - You feel like you're about to faint and fall off the swing. Your hands get clammy and the air tastes sour to breathe.

HALF LIGHT - Oh god, Harry! Oh god, Harry, what did you do...?!

VOLITION - No! Just nope. Say no to this, Harry.

- more of this!! >:( of volition trying to just avoid anything painful. wake up man.

LOGIC - Everything is so pretty and red -- you and Leo look like brothers as you glance around with similar childlike wonder.

VOLITION - Keep it together, no need to show your wonder.

- why? :( it's not hurting anyone. legendary difficulty passive for volition, high levels of volition are sometimes questionable. I love collecting all these instances of volition making weird suggestions. it's like when people point out really weird things Kim does, that you don't really notice as weird because he does it so calmly and confidently.

VOLITION - Huh... no, Mr. Conclusion. You're always kind of limited in your analytical abilities. That's not *her* fault. But still...

- volition: you're kind of limited in your analytical abilities... meanwhile logic and viscalc and ency calling you stupid and brain damaged lol. vol is so gentle about it!!

- then again...

VOLITION - ...no? He's not going to show up? I'm sorry, your lie detection isn't working. It's not her doing, he's just totally inept. It looks like you're also an idiot. But that's not her fault.

- lol.

RHETORIC - This is good. Clear the air first -- between you two -- then move on to questions.

VOLITION - No, it's not good. It's the opposite of that. This will let her dictate the terms of your...

RHETORIC - Shush. I can't hear what she's saying.

- no. don't ever cut off or shush volition ever again

- >:(

YOU - No-no-no-no...

INLAND EMPIRE - Yes, yes, yes, yes.

VOLITION - No-no, we're not starting with that. Not now. Not this time. This thought is over.

- volitionnnn... ily. my own volition also cuts off dangerous lines of thought for me. I think he's got to be constantly vigilant, in order to be so good at it. must be exhausting :(

YOU - "Can't promise that. I might attack him again." [Leave.]

KIM KITSURAGI - The lieutenant groans, but doesn't say anything.

VOLITION - That's right, you *should* do it again! It's the *last* thing he'll be expecting.

- uhm. not sure that's a good idea!!

VOLITION - You're too weak to say 'no' now. Waking up is the worst part. Maybe somewhere down the line you could decline...

- referring to declining the speed. all volition fails are very sad

VOLITION - Yes, look at yourself. What do you see?

YOU - Just a sorry stack of shit...

VOLITION - Yeah, didn't even know they stack shit *that* sorry.

- beautiful, rare volition scolding you!!!! after you disregard his advice and don't apologize to kim after the church fail. he's on your side, but he also knows he needs to tell you that this wasn't okay.

VOLITION - First the investigation, now this... how many more things do you have to fuck up?

- this one too! same scenario. this is a difficulty 16 (Godly) check...

- yes this again. it just needs to be in here. the volition panic attack. if this volition passive doesn't fire, you take no volition damage. it's completely self-inflicted :(((

PAYPHONE - The headset lands in the cradle with a clank. There it sits -- still warm from your hand. You have no idea what just happened.

(heal 2 endurance and 2 volition)

- if you hang up the phone before dora picks up!

VOLITION - He subdues the feeling. Dusts himself off and moves on. So should you. There will be other chances.

(heal 2 volition)

- if Kim misses getting a picture of the phasmid

HORRIFIC NECKTIE - The necktie is guiding you through this. It's your spirit animal, both your nemesis and friend. Suddenly a feeling of ease brushes through you -- you're fine again.

(heal 2 volition and 1 endurance)

AUTHORITY - That... was the most honourable thing anyone has ever done, Harry.

(heal all volition)

- very special incidences of healing more than 1 volition at once!! the fact that healing/damaging morale is just directly called heal/damage volition in the variable naming is. yeah. I think about it constantly. does it hurt him? I think it does. and he never says anything about it (unlike endurance!) he just bears with it quietly.

VOLITION - In honour of your shit, lieutenant-yefreitor. Which you kept *together* in the face of total, unrelenting terror. Day after day. Second by second.

INLAND EMPIRE - DETECTIVE

ESPRIT DE CORPS - ARRIVING

AUTHORITY - ON THE SCENE

- obviously this one has to be in here. funnily enough, in my second playthrough I had 2 PSY but everyone had been bumped up enough that they all fired except authority... I ended up throwing a point into authority and retrying the dialogue so it could be complete haha

VOLITION - What? I thought you had your shit together! This is nearing a complete meltdown! Stop it!

- volitionnn :( if you don't stop you have a panic attack, so I guess he's only trying to help

- this is too funny. volition honey, you absolutely do add flair too

YOU - Oh, you mean Cuno?

VOLITION - Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner!

- yup, absolutely no flair. Super. Tip-top!

VOLITION - These guys are compromised. She's got them singing along to her tune. The little bleeps and bloops you trust for info -- you can't trust them anymore.

- it would be a crime to not include the bleeps and bloops in here! why does he call them that?? haha

- rare instance of volition not being able to stop the disaster!

INLAND EMPIRE - Your surroundings are undisturbed. While you slept, you were alone. Now that you're awake -- you're still alone.

HALF LIGHT - Get the fuck out of here. Fuck this place, fuck this world, fuck this life, fuck this body -- just fucking go.

SAVOIR FAIRE - The sheets are stained red. Your blood's been running again. Keep it together. Just get out of here and finish this fucking thing.

VOLITION - Harry... I know there's not much to say -- but if nothing else, just remember that you've made it this far. And it's just a bit farther now. Let's finish this.

- this is just. it's awful, if you have the final dream all alone. but at least you have volition with you

DICK MULLEN AND THE MISTAKEN IDENTITY - Dick Mullen was made to crack skulls and solve cases. It's who he is. He could no more stop being a detective than a tiger could cease to be a predator in the night.

VOLITION - You're no tiger, though, Harry. You're a man. It's your curse to have to choose.

- I like this one.

ELECTROCHEMISTRY - That sugary black rum stain on the counter makes you teary-eyed with joy. It's almost touching how syrupy and sticky it is. How long have you been up already?

YOU - Not now.

ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Oh *excuse me*, do you have something better to do than lust for sweet syrupy rum and lemonade? With a twist of lemon? Maybe lime? Maybe who cares, just rum?

VOLITION - Yes, you do have something better to do. Stop drooling over that stupid rum stain and go. Before it's too late.

- this is a challenging (difficulty 12) check! it's very difficult to resist the sticky rum stain I guess

YOU - Give up.

LOGIC - There we go. Your mind is a relaxed muscle. It's so nice and easy to give up, isn't it? On the downside -- you have no idea what you were supposed to do now. I could have *debriefed* you.

VOLITION - Blissful idiot -- say something. You've stood there for too long.

- blissful idiot

VOLITION - Don't be an idiot and say it. In this day and age, of all times. It won't end well.

- once again, volition pushing you away from the bi-curious thing. :( he just wants to keep you safe, but it comes at a cost.

- you can't just wrap harry in bubblewrap, volition. he'll never grow

- volition absolutely saving the day here. do NOT say it harry! authority's advice is SO hit or miss

VOLITION - It's time to leave it be. You're about to make a child cry. Are you proud of yourself?

YOU - Damn right I am! Proud as the Lion of Serber.

VOLITION - Excuse me, I'm not sure I heard that properly...

- volition ily. he has to deal with so much.

VOLITION - Should we? He's *nice*. I don't like *nice*.

- this is so funny. he's very suspicious.

VOLITION - Look at it, detective. And be ashamed. Until you make it right by *legally purchasing* that raincoat, I'll make sure you feel guilty every time you see it.

- YES YES conscience volition!!

YOU - Close the carabiner.

SLEEPING DOCKWORKER - The sleeping dockworker has little to say about your actions. He remains silent.

VOLITION - You're not 100% clear what you did here was *right*, but to hell with it...

- only sometimes!!

VOLITION - I can't restrain this one. The need to *cop* is too strong. You just need to ask it.

- why are you trying to restrain copping??? this guy, sometimes. he's so stupid (affectionate)

VOLITION - That's it. I'm calling it. Kim is beyond compromised.

- uhm. volition completely overcompensating with the compromised skills is quite funny. once drama wakes up, he does it too

VOLITION - See? It's oddly moderate. Probably compromised.

- oddly moderate now means compromised??

- this is it. this is volition's only comment on this disastrous authority fail. he makes no attempt to stop it!!

VOLITION - Being Cuno's pig has a steadying effect on your hand. Go with the flow, man...

- volition's so silly sometimes

DAMAGED LEDGER - You feel that thing in the back of your head? That little voice, that quiet scream? You already felt this was a bad idea, but especially right now it's even worse. Try as you might, you can't read it now.

VOLITION - You've got *business* to deal with first. Talk to the Union boss first, at least... I can't stop you for long, but there's just enough of an excuse now.

- Volition fighting for his life to stop you from reading the letter :,(

VOLITION - If it's possible, then by pure willpower alone. You are going to have to become... a psycholocomotor.

- that is *not* a real word but we love you anyway vol

LOGIC - Is that how it is now? We should just try all good things *twice* and then give up? By that logic...

VOLITION - Not you too...

- he's all alone out here :(

VOLITION - Someone's been a very busy boy. Good on you...

- thank you...?

VOLITION - *Very* off. Just let her go. Listen to me for once...

- for once?? :((( but if you try...

VOLITION - I can't help you. I am totally useless. Everything I've said is lies. I want the exact same bad things you want. To stand here, like a pillar of salt, saying...

- this is probably one of the saddest lines. all the skills falling apart in the dream is awful, but volition might be the worst. it's also very important that volition *does* want the exact same thing you want. He wants to drink and smoke and think of dora and die. And he chooses to resist it anyways. To be the only thing standing in your way. But it's to the point where it's all he knows. He knows that he has to resist the things he wants, and will occasionally take it too far. Keeping Harry (and himself) from things that will make them happy. In the setting of the game, Volition keeps things together and on track. But once Harry is back in his normal life, it will become very much a double edged sword I think. Luckily(?) it will self balance a bit, where if Volition prevents Harry from being happy then he'll lose morale, weakening volition, and then vol won't prevent harry as much and it'll balance out. hopefully.

VOLITION - Despair creeps into you, getting fat on your weakness. Whatever noble intentions you once had as a police officer -- it's eating them all up now.

VOLITION - Nothing you can say would make you feel any better now...

- 😭 I hate this, I hate the volition death. the endurance one is really painful too, but this one's painful in a different way. Volition isn't getting back up from this. the awful newspaper clipping saying you go to live under a bridge... that's what happens when you let volition die?? if any of the other skills (except endurance) drop to 0 you can just raise them back up, but vollll.... ugh.

VOLITION - Listen... It's okay to take a few minutes to yourself. Sit down and have a breather.

ENDURANCE - You need to rest. Your body is aching. Getting in here has taken something out of you. Have a seat.

- our two health pool boys encouraging you to take care of yourself <3

YOU - "Kim, can *you* see it?!"

KIM KITSURAGI - "I can see it."

VOLITION - Four simple words -- thank god. If he can see, then you're not insane.

- this one is obviously very important.

YOU - "I've finally gone insane..." (Put your head in your hands.)

[...]

VOLITION - My god... maybe you *are*.

- if Kim and Cuno aren't there, and your Volition is really low, you get this very sad fail. :(

VOLITION - True, you ought not love ruins and hell -- and the fading scent of apricots.

- I like this one.

WASHERWOMAN - "I *can* wash it for you," she says after looking the jacket over, "but it's going to take about a half an hour. Think you can stay put for that long?"

VOLITION - Hell yeah!

PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - No, we must run around ceaselessly. It would be torture to stay put.

- I really really love him.

YOU - "By the way, I'm going to sing karaoke here."

GARTE, THE CAFETERIA MANAGER - "Absolutely out of the question."

VOLITION - You wait and see, cafeteria manager!

- volition will not be told no!!

VOLITION - No one can STOP you from finding the phasmid.

PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - WHAT IS HAPPENING TO YOU?!?! Are you going to CRY now, son?

VOLITION - You heard the coach! This is weakness. It cannot go on much longer, or you will LOSE.

- these guys are great. coach!

YOU - Right. Activate Denial Mode.

VOLITION - You're not really an automaton, you do know that?

- oh, thank you for the insight volition

- even your most willful, imaginative skills know this scope creep was insurmountable...

DRAMA - But we *are* awake, sire! She has been forthcoming -- with sordid details women usually conceal! Most *shocking* details of the sexual kind! We are a bulwark, un-breached...

VOLITION - You've been breached, bulwark. You've been breached, like, a thousand times now!

- nooo poor drama (volition is right)

- Volition trying to reassure you after the Tribunal is very important.

- SO TRUE.

DRAMA - This may have been a *grave* mistake, sire.

VOLITION - Maybe. Maybe not. Mercy is rarely a *complete* mistake.

- I really adore this quote.

I think I'm going to leave it here. I haven't included some quotes that I put in other posts already but I might add them in later to have a comprehensive Volition post... But I've spent like 4 hours on this already so I'm giving it a rest for now :)

[irondad-and-spiderson]

Hi! Sorry to bother, idk if you take asks like this (if you don't feel free to ignore!) but do you know any good fics where SI employees bully/threaten/mistreat Peter and Tony comes to the rescue? Thank you so much for your time 💙💙

Hi! I absolutely do! I might just take forever to respond and take your prompt a little loosely 😃 The three under the cut are employees with (valid) security concerns. I know there are more that I can’t find, so anyone feel free to add some 😉

A Big Security Issue by FotiBrit

When Peter lost his Stark Industries Staff ID, Tony handed the kid his own. That was never an issue, until Peter had to check in at the front desk.

-

The Cusp of a Breath by SpaceCowboysFromMars

“That was the most stressful thing I’ve ever experienced.” Peter says as he and Tony make their way into the crowd. He wipes his sweaty palms on his thighs, cringing when he remembers how much the suit costs.

“You got shot on patrol last month.”

“This was worse.”

Or; Peter is introduced as the official heir of Stark Industries, but not everyone is completely welcoming of his presence. Luckily, he has a pretty awesome mentor to keep him on track.

-

the love (and other things) you inherit by ironfidus

“Which is why,” Catherine says, unblinking, as delicately as she can, “the board requires that you name a successor in the event of your untimely demise. The risk has simply become too great for us to ignore.”

Tony Stark’s spent a large portion of his life thinking about legacy: his legacy, his company’s, Iron Man’s. He’s spent a lot of time fighting to protect his legacy, too. But today, with a lawyer as his witness and FRIDAY as his one-AI cheerleading squad, he stops, takes a step back, and lets go instead—because for the first time, his legacy isn’t about him, not really.

And as FRIDAY would say: it’s about damn time.

Alternatively: Tony updates his will and gets himself an heir, Peter gets a promotion (for lack of a better word), and the rest of the world gets a wake-up call—in that order. Ft. an impatient board of directors, a Stark Industries charity gala, and a universe in which Tony Stark gets to be happy.

-

Security Bias by Sara (ctrsara)

Happy Hogan asks Daren Anderson to help him out with a little project.

My take on idk-bruh-20's irondad fic ideas #128: Fic where, after a security incident in which some bozo accused Peter of trespassing at Stark Tower, Happy holds an emergency briefing for the entire SI security team.

The topic of the briefing? The absolutely untouchable, vital-to-know-if-you-want-to-keep-your-job level of importance of one Peter Parker.

:)

Five Times Tony Stark's Fabled Intern Just Showed Up + One Time He Was Invited by kingdomfaraway

While Leroy didn’t like gossip, he wasn’t immune to it and he’d heard about a young boy claiming to be Tony Stark’s intern showing up randomly throughout the building. He just figured it was some random mystery, a Stark Industries cryptid if you will.

Never did he think he’d have a sighting.

“Are you Peter Parker?” Leroy questioned, narrowing his eyes at the young boy, looking for any signs of deceit.

“Oh yeah, that’s me, hi!” Possibly Fabled Intern Peter Parker reached into his pocket and pulled out a badge and lanyard, this one with his face on it and INTERN written underneath it. “Mr. Stark got me a badge so I can get nachos whenever I want.”

-

Chapter 1 of 200 Park Avenue (5+1) by Sara (ctrsara)

Peter hasn't seen Mr. Stark, or been able to go out as Spider-man since he turned down his invitation to join the Avengers a few weeks ago. He ends up at Stark Tower rather randomly, finding an unlikely hero in Mr. Stark's AI, then keeps returning for different purposes.

The first chapter is a short I did for Comfortember 2022 that I've just kept thinking about. I'm building on that story and creating a 5+1 to explore the new dynamic (post-Homecoming) in another way.

Or

5 Times Peter Visited Stark Tower and 1 Time He Stayed

-

Home by patrochilles_trash ((it’s less angsty than it sounds))

Tony had been out of the country for weeks on SI business, and Peter was having a hard time. He missed him, plain and simple.

Okay. Maybe not so plain and simple.

Peter had a rough time in the weeks and months that followed the final defeat of Thanos in the ruins of the Compound. Thrust back into life, only to be forced to fight for the lives of the entire universe for the second time at only sixteen-years-old, and then to be told that his last living relative died in a crash during his five year absence did wonders for his psyche.

He developed a nasty form of separation anxiety toward his mentor-turned-adoptive-father -- not that Tony fared much better himself -- and his therapist had said it was a side effect of PTSD and that it would get better over time.

OR

A small field trip fic to SI where Tony has been out of the country for a few weeks, and Peter isn't handling it well.

Don't be fooled. This garbage fluff to avoid my other fics that I'm writing

[cheesycatz]

The Worm's Apple

(Spamton AU reference sheet) 1 2

Text ver and close ups below

This version of Spamton claims to be a spam program, but his credibility appears to be dubious. Covered from neck to toe and wearing a strange mask, the little of him that is visible doesn't quite match. But, the only thing more hated than spam is malware, so what reason would he have to lie?

- He walks stiffly. His torso barely moves, his legs don't bend, and his arms hang limply when he attempts to look normal.

- He purposefully wears baggy clothes to hide the abnormal shape of his body and limbs.

- While he attempts to make his legs look plantigrade, the actual digitigrade shape of his legs often shows through his pants.

- He keeps his long tail curled tightly behind him. However, it often unfurls when he experiences strong emotions or feels comfortable.

- His neck is unnaturally long and flexible, as though it lacks vertebrae.

- Not beating the cat allegations

- Spamton often hisses and spikes up his fur when angry or threatened. His suit limits his senses, physical defenses, and mobility, so he resorts to many threats.

- Even when alone in the city, Spamton usually leaves his suit on until he can bring it home. However, he won't pass up the opportunity for a meal along the way.

- (Tiny comparison of a real spam program, an addison, and Spamton in the bottom right corner)

- Spamton actually keeps himself as clean as possible, even if he can't clean his clothes. Regardless, he likes performing his self cleaning mechanisms as a stim, even while wearing his suit. He rubs his nose and rubs his arms together in the same way that insects clean dust off their antennae and legs.

- Spamton's hands are quite small, and his relatively long fingers often show up through his mittens. The fabric is damaged from the numerous holes that his claws have poked through them.

- He's around 5 ft (~150 cm) tall, with a 7ft (~215 cm) long tail

-----

I'm no character designer (Spamton's suit here is literally just the miniature outfit I made for my spam plush), but I like what Disguised Wormton has become over the past two years. While completely accidental, the five-petal shape and yellow thread of his button/pin perfectly represents an apple tree blossom, a nod to his symbolism. The rest of his attempt at an outfit is "hide as much as possible, but still look good doing it." ...as good as he thinks an untucked shirt and clothes ten sizes too big look. He's meant to appear incredibly uncanny when he puts effort into "being normal," looking more like a shuffling zombie than anything natural. I think the round and wide shapes of his suit contrasted with the long, thin, and sharp points of his only visible features adds to the untrustworthness he radiates. His animalistic tendencies look worse when performed by something trying to look humanoid. Even if it's more comfortable for him, the incorrect bend of his legs, the perpetual raptor arms, the absurdly long tail, and his awkwardly long neck highlight the concept of something trying so hard to look human (or humanoid in the case of Deltarune) yet always failing. That's what I was going for when designing him, at least. After writing like 50k words about disguised Wormton, he honestly might be creepier than normal Wormton. I'd rather deal with the obscure cryptid that hisses and runs away than be approached by this kidney stealer lookin mf trying to sell used cigarettes or something. He's definitely grown on me, though. In a "I would never want to be locked in a room with any of the characters I like" kind of way.

[connorsbonez]

Stalkers and Cryptids

Timeline: Pre-OT4, Middle of OT3

About: Tim and Wes have a conversation about fucking up and how to proceed afterwards.

Court Talk

Tim watched as Wes turned the basketball in his hands with a contemplative expression on his freckled face out of the corner of his eye. The ginger hadn’t said anything since he dragged Tim out to a basketball court, leaving them in prolonged silence, and the vigilante could only imagine what possessed Wes to bring him out here.

He wondered distantly whether or not he could come up with a good reason to leave early without guilt so he could go back to the cold case he’d been working on.

Tim just wanted to be able to drown everything out, ignore his personal problems, and hyper focus on cases so he could actually help someo-

He grunted as something slammed into his stomach, instinctually grabbing it before it registered to him what it was. Tim glanced down at the basketball in confusion before looking up at an unamused Wes with knitted brows.

Wes scoffed softly, his head rolled back slightly as well as his eyes at the motion before he met Tim’s gaze again. “You were making that face again.”

“What face?”

“That really dumb one when you’re slowly slipping into self-depreciation from overthinking.”

Tim frowned. “I don’t make that face.” Who was he kidding, he probably did.

The ginger raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment, instead gesturing a hand over at the hoop. “Think you can make that shot?”

He pursed his lips, a feeling of frustration sparking in his chest, “What are you doing?” He asked, his grip on the basketball tightening. “Why are we here?”

Why are you still choosing to be around me? To have me in your life still?

“To rewrite the Declaration of Independence in a backwards Dutch-Ghostspeak love language.” Wes replied voice laced so heavily with sarcasm that Tim could practically taste it, crossing his arms as he leaned back on his heels. “We’re here to hang out, play basketball and I kick your ass at it, and I don’t know…” The conspiracy theorist paused, trailing off, the frown on his face softening as he looked down with a grimace at the ground for a brief moment. “…talk, I guess.” He ended the sentence awkwardly.

This is the weirdest breakup he’s ever experienced. Tim couldn’t help but think and he says as much, earning himself an incredulous look from Wes that quickly morphed into a familiar expression of ‘you’re such a fucking idiot’ and Tim used to think it wasn’t possible to have that look and have it still manage to look so fond (so painfully fond), but still very much annoyed, until the very first time he saw Wes make that expression at Danny and later Tim himself.

“Why the hell would you think that?”

Because I messed up, because my mistake got him hurt which in turn hurt you, because I’m a stupid horrible person who couldn’t not be nosy for one fucking moment and doesn’t deserve this and shouldn’t have had pretended I did.

“I think you know.” He answered vaguely, glancing away.

Wes’ eyes narrowed slightly, green eyes seemed to soften into a sort of understanding, an understanding much deeper than just getting what Tim meant and he couldn’t begin to imagine what Wes got. The ginger sighed and opened his arms, obligating the vigilante to bounce the basketball into his hands. Wes twisted the ball in his grip for a moment before he started bouncing it idly as he turned to face the hoop, Tim followed his gaze briefly before settling back at the theorist.

“I almost exposed Danny’s identity to a government branch that wanted to vivisect him and use him for experiments.” Wes confessed almost with an eerie casualness if not for the breathless way he said it, like he had to force the words out or else they’d never be heard, as he made the shot, the ball traced the rim before falling through the hoop, the bouncing was almost louder than it should have been as Tim stood in stiffened silence, trying to process what Wes just said.

Not that Wes gave him the time, continuing to plow through this conversation as he walked over to grab the ball, it seemed to shake in his hold as he stared down at it. “I’ve never been good at keeping secrets in the sense that I couldn’t leave things to lay, I didn’t understand that some things shouldn’t be brought to light. Ever. When I saw a mystery, I wanted to solve it and show it off to everyone and their mothers.”

Wes let out a huff that sounded close to a dull laugh. “Danny had a mystery that I had solved ages ago, it was pretty obvious for me, the problem was that no one seemed to see it too or believed me when I tried to tell them. Of course, I couldn’t leave it as that. I just had to get people to believe me and See The Truth.” His nose scrunched up at the end of his words and Tim thought that Wes’ green eyes seemed to glow for a moment under the setting sun.

“I did so many stupid things to try and prove it, things that Danny will probably happily tell you because some of them are downright mortifying. Like intensive stalking and publicly accusing him of being a ghost with his ghost hunting parents not two feet away from him.” The conspiracy theorist paused, taking in a breath as he bounced the ball a few times as if to comfort or ground himself. “The GIW hadn’t seemed so bad back then, for the humans at least, for those who didn’t know what they were really like and that unfortunately included me for a bit. And I was desperate at this point for anyone to believe me, so desperate that I fucking emailed the GIW about how I knew Phantom’s identity with some of my proof attached to make them believe me.”

Tim’s mouth was slightly hanging from that. “You what?”

Wes grimaced as he bounced the ball more harshly. “Yep. If Danny hadn’t broken into my house when he did to explain, it…would have ended much differently.” He finished his sentence after a moments of hesitation, turning again to throw the ball through the hoop again and going to retrieve it. Leaving Tim to process what he just learned.

Eventually Tim found Wes standing in front of him again, he looked at the ginger and licked his dry lips. “How’d you fix it?” He asked, his voice coming out more quiet than he wanted too. “How…did you get Danny to forgive you for that? He must have been angry with you.”

Wes blinked slowly, leaning back on his heels in a casual manner. “Oh. He didn’t.”

“What?”

“He didn’t forgive me.” Wes said slowly, like he was talking about the weather, as he leaned forward slightly and met Tim’s eyes again.

Tim stared back into green eyes as his body felt chilled, as if someone dumped a bucket of ice water onto him. An ugly bubbling feel squirmed inside him and made him ponder distantly if he was going to throw up or not. “But..you’re dating. You’re together.” He pointed out with a frown, confused on how Danny could date Wes if he didn’t forgive him.

The ginger sighs like he was an old man who just got told his dumbass grandkids were out doing something stupid and he needed to go get them. Wes let the ball hit the ground and roll off slowly as he crossed his arms. “Yeah. We are.”

“But..he doesn’t forgive you.”

“Uh huh.” Wes sighed again and scratched the back of his neck. “Look, here’s the thing Tim, no one’s obligated to forgive someone when they fuck up, majorly or not. It’s purely up to that person. But just because they don’t forgive that person, that doesn’t mean they can’t move on and grow from the experience, and maybe that results in those people losing contact or maybe they get close again as friends, family or lovers. It just..depends on the situation and the people.”

Wes paused to take a breath. “That’s not to, like, say there isn’t work both people have to put into healing that relationship, because there is. It’s so much work to repair that broken trust and mend the foundation so it can grow into something new.”

“Something new?”

“Well, yeah, there’s no fucking way that relationship is going to be exactly the same if it gets fixed.”

Tim swallowed thickly, uncomfortable and a little scared to ask his next question. “So..Danny’s never going to forgive me but with work he’ll hopefully still want to be with me?”

“I don’t know.” Wes replied with a simple shrug, making Tim blink widely in confusion. “What? What do you mean you don’t know?”

“It means, I don’t know whether or not Danny’s gonna forgive you and still want to be in a relationship with you. I’m not Danny, I don’t always know what’s going on in that cracked kaleidoscope mind of his.” Wes explained a bit too fondly as he poked at his temple. “But, if you ask for my personal opinion, you and Danny will be just fine. I mean, he’s dating me, on good terms with multiple of his rouge gallery, and is friends with two of his exes that have either successfully killed him or have tried too.”

That was so much information at once, holy hell. “What-“

“Plus, not to sound egotistical or anything, but what I did was arguably worse compared to what you did. You did it out of a source of concern and love, I did it for the ego boost.”

“Wes-“

“What I’m trying to say is,” Wes carried on, clasping his hands together, “there’s nothing to worry about as long as you guys do some simple little thing.”

Tim raised an eyebrow. “What?”

Wes inhaled and leaned forward slightly. “Talk to one another and figure it out.”

The vigilante paused and blinked several times because…that’s it? Really? And he asks as such, tone utterly confused. Wes laughed in response and shrugged, something he’s been doing a lot recently, as he gave Tim an almost flat look.

“Yep, that’s it. Shocking isn’t it? But yeah, that’s all you really have to do, just…sit down and talk to each other. Figure yourselves out and how y’all are going to continue from there.”

That…was a plan. Not something Tim did very much, both as a Drake and as a Drake-Wayne, but it was a plan nonetheless. It didn’t remove the anxiety that thrashed and clawed inside him, the fear and the what ifs. Not adding that there was something to this plan that was wrong in the way that something wasn’t even mentioned in it.

“What about you?”

Wes paused and his nose scrunched up in confusion. “Huh?”

“What about you.” Tim repeats his words again as he stared down the theorist. “Where do you stand in this situation, Wes? You’ve given me advice and how to proceed with this situation and what could possibly happen but you’ve never stated your own opinion on this.”

Wes frowned slightly at Tim. “I thought it was pretty obvious what my stance was on this.”

“No, no, not really. Well- kind of? Look, I guess what I’m trying is ask is…” Tim paused, resisting the urge to lick his lips as his heart squeezed painfully at the thought he’d formed. “..Should Danny and I…break up because of this, will we also be separating?” Tim’s voice slowly got quieter as he asked the elephant in the room, the dreadful question.

Wes blinked slowly, as if this wasn’t something the ginger had thought too hard about, and he was silent for a long moment which made Tim’s skin itch before he finally replied. “…No. I’m not going to leave you should you and Danny end up breaking up.”

Something loosened in Tim’s chest, only slightly but it was still a nice weight removal all the same.

“Really?”

Wes made a micro expression like he instinctually wanted to say something snarky before his face quickly smoothed out and he nodded. “Really.”

“Okay…okay. I think it’s time I go talk to Danny.”

•• End ••

What did Tim do? Who knows! Up to you I guess.

:)

[wolfsrainrules]

Stares off into the distance:

So.

Apparently my brain is just going to run along with various crossovers. Today, I bring you the thought of a John Wick fusion au (actually five differnet ones) with Batman/DC. (Again: a reminder that all my DC/Batman knowledge is fandom based)

@north-peach hellllppppp

Couple of thoughts for this.

The First: Janet Drake is one of the underworld's best. She's fantastic at manipulation and killing. She could walk herself out of a situation covered in blood, and convince people who saw it all happen that she never touched the body.

Tim grows up at her knee. He learns for the very best. And Janet teaches him everything she can- because despite the job and the crazy hours, and the travel, she loves her son. She wants to give him every opportunity to make it out alive from anything. Unharmed and not in trouble if possible, but alive most of all.

John Wick is a ghost story to the underworld. Tim has always been curious about people who could cause such a stir as his mother or John Wick might. When he meets him, he decides that man is Friend Shaped despite every sign saying Do Not. Despite every horror story saying it's a bad plan. (Much as he will later look at a story in a city of a cryptid said to be a manifestation of a city, a demon, a physical representation of all those who have died unavenged and decide the same)

More than that- John has ZERO idea how to handle Tim. He's a k i d. John's not gonna kill him for just...showing up all the time. It's not like he interferes or causes problems. In fact, he helps sometimes. Provides info, or a direction, a place to crash-

Tim confuses John.

Tim is also the very first to congratulate him, when he manages to get out of the underworld for Helen and mean it. To not even question the 'impossibility' of the Baba Yaga deciding he was done. John didn't bother to ask how Tim knew he'd left and why before the news actually broke out.

Tim watching John get out, go for it and SUCCEED is what gives him the courage to confess to his mother that he wanted to spend some time outside of the underworld, watching the curious case of Batman and Gotham. And Janet loves her son. So she arranges for it to be so.

They both know who Bruce Wayne is. Janet had figured it out before even Tim. She makes him promise that, if he needs her, he will call her, and lets him hunker in Gotham while he does what he wishes. She makes some trips back to Gotham, of course, but not so many that enemies can figure out there's someone important to her there. Janet is THE Femme Fatale. She has plenty of people who would go after her boy. And she's not having that.

Tim doesn't actually PLAN to get involved in vigilante life. At all. He's underworld born and bred. He's a survivor, manipulative, and can be a level of cunning and cold and ambitious that always makes his mother so so proud. He's not a do-right kind of person. He's not someone who does things for people outside of "me and mine" without a reason. Or if it goes against his moral code.

Except Jason Todd becomes one of "Me and Mine". He's a friend. A nosy vigilante who sees that his friend is alone and sets off his instincts as dangerous yes, but also as 'not a civilian' in a conventional sense. He's not a street rat, but he's not...normal either. And Tim? Tim, once he decides this Robin is his Robin, well he can't very well leave him undefended doing this ALONE can he? Though he understands by working with Robin, he cant use the tried and true methods of murder, as it could get pinned to Robin or Batman and he can't have that. If he wants to fly with Jason, he needs to fly by his rules. So a new vigilante is born that runs the streets with Robin. A little more vicious but in a cold and precise manner. Exacting. He doesn't let Jason go after his mother without doing the information gathering, and stops his death by Joker.

For a time, Tim finds himself pulled into the Wayne family, and he...thrives with them. He's happy. He learns under them. Expands his skillset, and still sent out to learn from people around the world. He is NOT fool enough to turn that away- his mother would somehow KNOW wherever she was if he turned down that kind of opportunity and he did not want to imagine the disappointment and response. NO THANK YOU.

When the underworld is kicked like a hornets' nest by John Wick coming back into the fold, Tim is...curious. He's kept an eye on John and Helen, if not stayed in direct and constant contact with them. He hadn't expected John to step foot back into the underworld.

And then his mother sends word to him, calls him back to the Continental, warns that the underworld is getting REALLY kicked up as a result. Tim...needs to go. He cannot imagine NOT answering his mother.

He arranges things on the Gotham end. Says temporary goodbyes and gets to the NY branch asap. Beats his mother there.

Makes it just in time to see John Wick pull a gun on Continental Grounds and shoot a newly crowned seat at the Table and is caught up in the chaos.

His family are going to end UP in the chaos themselves, because they will not cannot leave Tim in it alone. The connections Tim has are MUCH a surprise, he's done very well in hiding exactly what he used to do, and WHY he has a contact and hand in everything, and can ALWAYS get his family what they need. The Second: Tim Drake still grows up at Janet's knee. He learns it all. Thrives in it all. He ends up NOT going down the road of hitman or assassin or any number of things he could have done. Instead Tim Drake chooses to be a Information Broker that claims Gotham eventually, and by means of getting taken in by Bruce, the Wayne Manor and grounds around it become neutral grounds much like the Continental, if you want Tim's services to remain open to you. If you pull the underworld onto the ground...well. Just because Tim goes by Bruce's rules, and just because he PREFERS the route of nonviolence does not in any way mean he would not kill to protect it. To prove a point. To make a statement. To allow one to get away with it is to allow danger to his family and he WILL NOT, no matter that they all are perfectly capable of defending themselves. The Underworld is entirely different than their villains. To not kill the offender is to open themselves to weakness and targets. So Tim WILL.

Gotham is not Wayne Manor. The City is fair game to the underworld. Wayne Manor is NOT.

The Third:

Janet raises her boy at her knee still. Tim chooses the route of Doctor instead. He sets up in Gotham, and decides he likes the foolish vigilantes enough to step in when it's needed and save their lives. He becomes known to the Batfam as a Doc that will not ask questions, but is absolutely one of the most capable people they've seen. If Leslie isn't available, or not close enough, they go to Tim, if Tim doesn't find them, because he certainly seems to know when they need it.

The Batfam does sometimes find him having dealt with Some Things underworld involved so they are WORRIED about their idiot, despite the fact that Tim can and will Wreck everyone that causes problems in his area. He has also shown up stripping off blood covered scrub tops or whatever cause hes coming in hot from another healing thing, and they all wonder and worry and just- it's fine. Everything is fine.

They worry anyway.

Despite the fact that Tim has friends seemingly everywhere, from all walks of life, favors all over, and connections to seemingly everything as a result of his work. (He has absolutely been offered favors as payment, hits, assassinations and all sorts of things. He never turns them away. Janet taught him better. Instead he has markers and logs, books and written promises all stacked away. He remembers them all of course, but better to have written proof somewhere, something official. The Continental holds it for him.

The Fourth:

Gotham HAS a Continental Hotel due to all of its.....everything. Janet Drake runs it. Tim knows EVERYONE and everything, and has absolutely run the counter often. Bruce doesn't know what it is. Ra's absolutely does. Tim is the next to take over the branch and EVERYONE knows it.

He ends up occasionally, when people step on his morals, providing information to the Bat.

Jason managed to find his way inside by accident, and may or may not get himself heavily involved in the underworld even BEFORE the Red Hood thing.

The Fifth:

Same concept as 4 except BRUCE WAYNE runs the Continental and the ripples of everything therein.

[zones-spinterest-corner]

Fuck it, why not end out the year with some TPC headcanons :] (but only the characters I have headcanons for)

Cube:

Half-monster, freakishly tall and strong (even by cube standards) because of it

Has a rather soft voice, you know when he’s angry because that softness goes outta the window

He’s muscular, but not in the dehydrated “sexy” sense, but in the actual strongman sense

WILL crush your back in a hug

Iris:

Posh twat /aff

Morally questionable at the beginning, gets sense knocked into him and is now trying to unlearn some harmful rhetoric he learned growing up

Paradise’s most hated man /hj

Malewife

Seems like he’d be a tea drinker only, actually prefers coffee

Wasn’t revived by Calcifer/The Reaper, was instead revived by Prism/the Trees due to being needed as a caretaker (Calcifer refused to revive him)

Pentellow:

Southern. She’s southern you can’t convince me otherwise

The only competent caretaker

Lowkey shit at cooking, can make a mean apple pie though

Reckless due to the natural polygon durability boost, worries the shit out of the others on a daily basis

Likes dirt

Girlboss (if Iris is the malewife she’s the girlboss I’m sorry)

Pyrare:

Kind of a cryptid, will appear behind you ominously and scare you when he asks if you want casserole for dinner

Aromantic, but not asexual (I mean. Britt never said anything about his sexual orientation, just his romantic one, so I can hc him as aroallo if I want) (besides, he’s got a canon son lmao)

Likely autistic, but has lived for longer than the concept of autism in society so therefore he can’t possibly have it (he very much can)

Very flat voice, rarely has tonal changes unless he’s like. Really feeling an emotion

Ajacent:

Gossip machine, will find out the latest tea and spill it to her friends

Doesn’t live in the mountains anymore and doesn’t communicate with her sisters often either (hmm I wonder why)

Not a fan of the heroes, she finds them a little too child-like (she’s not a fan of children in general)

Circubit:

Fat and proud of it <3

Really good at playing the piano thanks to his mother, though he prefers an electric keyboard

One of Ajacent’s gossip buddies

Does not like Lythorus due to Lycanthropy being the most unlikeable fucker in existence (Lyth is better in that regard but Circubit still hates him lmao)

Learning robotics purely to maintain Cyanogen (Cyanide)’s body, gets frustrated with it easily

Gold:

Snake boy (hc adopted from MugzyMiik/October)

Has a small hiss to his speech

Takes after Pyrare in being the cryptid of the heroes

Likes fluffy things :3

Tsavorite:

Literal embodiment of :3

Impossible to hate, he’s too nice to everyone

First hero to truly bond with Cyanogen

Learning some recipes left over by Pentellow’s mom (she can’t cook but he can)

LOVES pie, no matter if sweet or savoury (though he’s particularly fond of cheese and onion pies)

Orange:

Nicknamed “grapefruit” by Iris, only lets him, Pente and Tsav call him that

The most laid back of the heroes

Has very fluffy hair under his hat

A little protective of Tsav (they’re brothers don’t take this the wrong way)

Has a sweet tooth

Cyan:

Filled with RAGE

Cube has to stop him from fistfighting Dub on a near daily basis

Annoying lil shit

Still wary of Cyanogen, hasn’t taken the time to bond with her

Lowkey racist towards pink shapes even though they’re harmless and natural now

Desperately needs a reality check

Cyanogen:

Wants to bond with Cyan, but is scared of him

Has at least 4GB of memes downloaded onto her, will rickroll you at any given opportunity

Cheeky, likes to pull pranks

Changed her name from Cyanide because she didn’t want to be named after a literal poison anymore </3

Caretaker is Circubit :3

[gloomyteddybear]

dark fantasy concept

introduction

tw/cw: blood, body horror, mild suggestive, fucked up morals and content that comes with the dark fantasy genre, dehumanization(?);

isekai modern-reader into 'ye olde darke-medieval-fantasy' but instead of into the body of a human to re-create the industrial revolution. put them into the body of a very cryptid/monstrous version of a vamp

at first mc starts like rlly feral, jumbly-instinct thoughts. but as they begin to drink more blood they get more grounded. so basically hunger = madness or smth.

there's also gamer/leveling up/system adjacent things. but only for mc. where it basically counts how much kills they have and it rewards them with skills and its also kinda like a countdown to how many liters of blood they have left until they go bonkers.

since it's the medieval times, technology ain't that good, or most of anything for that matter. it's bad.

since mc is a spoiled city mouse, they rlly want to have modern commodities that only rich people at this time gets. like frequent baths, good infrastructure and basic plumbing. fancy shit like that.

they kinda get obsessed w/ it since its literally the only thing that's familiar and comforting to them so they try rlly hard to get it. either by killing rich people and stealing their houses or building their own spooky mansion by becoming a noble or smth.

it's kinda like those tropes of rich pretty vampire that gets absolutely monstrous w/o blood. with the bright eyes and growling with sharp teeth.

mc really hates when they get feral cause it makes them feel like a mindless monster, not unlike those that gets killed by hunters and mercenaries. so they cope by being as 'civil/cultured/refined' as possible.

absolutely disgusted at the idea of drinking blood, so they keep gaslighting themself into thinking it's wine. prolly has tarps or smth on their table and fancy glasses.

they often come off as arrogant or stand-offish in the 'don't touch me with ur dirty hands peasant' way, but in reality they're just... a paranoid myso/germaphobe.

they're really fancy, imagine ye stereotypical vamp aesthetic but in sleeping robes. just, like, a really comfortable vampire.

and they have really terrifying non-romanticized features as a nod to the feral-cryptid side they rlly want to hide. like the trope of vampire having tapedum lucidum  or unique teeth marks (y's in leeches or patterns)---

---not those sharp and needle-like teeth for puncture that will leave delicate dot-scarring, perfect for symbiosis, self-control and donations. but textured teeth that's obvious that there's no way to stop the bleeding even if you wanted to, meant for gouging and death. kinda like bullet shrapnel or twisted daggers.

but it won't be complete w/out character interactions.

❤︎ mercenary / monster hunter (placeholder: montague )

>kinda like the witcher or mando at first glance. stoic, gruff guy, very tanky but somehow is very stealthy. has a dog trained to smell blood-trails and harmed prey, it is very rotund 'cause of treats. it's name is whinny (a pun, win, whiny, wine(both the drink and the olde english for friend)) like it's owner, the dog find you sus but later becomes attached to you.

>tendencies probably started out in pity, 'damn is this a baby vamp? hopeless. guess i gotta feed them so they get strong enough to be a honorable adversary'. love a guy with a code of honor but dubious morality. but then he got too into it? he finds the fact that a 'monster' has more of a moral compass than him interesting (ur human kill count being lower, disliking torture, etc) lowkey wants to fix you but in a making you better at murder way.

>has a protective dynamic w/ reader but only later on (monty basically wanted them dead lol), brings them lots of prey to feed on (mostly of the bipedal variety, wink wink nudge nudge), if ya refuse to feed there's definitely going to be some tough-love to encourage a healthy diet.

>can be either romantic or familial dynamic. but there's definitively a touch of fear/intimidation on either party.

❤︎ honored guest / your good friend (placeholder: aldwin )

>is either a himbo or really 'cowardly'. the first guy you ever met that you didn't outright attempt-to or kill. kinda milk-toast at first glance. but the only guy you know can't and won't kill you. you often contemplate turning him into a thrall to keep you company for as long as you 'live', (he isn't that opposed to the idea) but often back out because you still have modern sensibilities, mind control bad.

>you often baby him, both in fear of making him scared of you (the smell is fearousel not actual fear) and also because technically he is one compared to you. that's a grown man, he's not actually scared of your mansion he just wants to be near you 24/7.

>sometimes you use him as a juice box, but only after hosting extravagant dinner parties whenever he visits (which is often, on both), making sure he eats enough to replace the blood and too drunk to feel pain. it was actually his idea, managed to convince himself that the dinner is for replenishing and not because you want to celebrate him. the actual feeding is awkward, you refuse to use your teeth and used one of the dinner knifes.

>friend zone/ one sided. mc is in denial/deeply oblivious. can be read as codependent (emotionally).

❤︎ the scholar / the monster doctor (placeholder: boris )

>doctor/physician guy. he has glasses :), someone who takes ur ideas seriously, sees you as a kindred soul, both in the studies and about your nature. has a whole jekyll and hyde situation, his jobs is kinda the reason why he goes awoo in the night. he's surprisingly very soft? mild mannered, polite, a proper gentleman. (whinny hates him lmao)

>kinda a goldigger, first approached you with the intent of having you sponsor his 'research' (monster biology) but later decided to have a collab w/ you. you still treat him as kinda of a sugarbaby still, reserving a special place in the manor to serve as his lab and giving him lots of artifacts and equipment. you mostly do it to see if he has a cure for vampirism (aside from a very painful death), but it's nice to see a very chivalrous man get flustered when it's him being spoilt.

>the wolf side is the complete opposite of his demeanor, feral, bloodthirsty and animalistic, it attacks and destroys everything in it's wake, it cannot harm you due to your strength, but the intent is obvious. it's a very harrowing affair filled with angst, (except the part where you're prepping for the full moon and needing to chain him with silver), you know what's its like to lose control and hurt someone innocent so you always try to do damage control for his sake.

>kinda puts you in a pedestal, sees you as someone out of his league.

❤︎ the oldest servant / elder-vampire butler  (placeholder: aldair )

>kinda older looking in appearance but still pretty-boy enough(? somehow). you didn't turn him, he came with the mansion. he used to be a thrall to someone else but now he's a under your reign. has beef with everyone except monty (prolly teaming to make you less hopeless), specially hates aldwin. he's less alfred, more sebastian/claude or ron molan(TCF).

> it's not exactly known why he's loyal, considering he wanted to kill his previous sire and you don't treat him any better (by your standards, vampire culture is weird). maybe it was the way you just... 'subdued' it and allowed him the pleasure of killing his torturer? causing some weird begrudging-debt turned devotion, that or the fact that you are not a pureblood---or at least act like one.

> kinda thinks ur a spoiled wimp but still spoils you. way too knowledgeable abt your habits, you stretch out a hand and he's already putting a glass of 'wine' between your fingers. you shift in your seat? he's already getting you a footstool (mostly an unfaithful servant or a prisoner), you accidentally tear out someone's throat? he's already collecting their blood in bottles, cleaning the crime scene and creating your alibi.

> you're deff being primed for something. maybe related to the dozens of bottles (and sacrifices) in your cellar.

[nercocrafter]

I love how for everyone else's MCD rewrites, it's more leaning on realism and high fantasy, meanwhile, my tomfoolery of a rewrite (as of current, it might change idk) is MINECRAFT [in its current version + the mod packs Aphmau had] mixed with realism. You see, while everyone else was born into the world and conforms to realistic boundaries (within a realistic high fantasy universe), you got near polar opposites for Aphmau because she applies by MC logic. I wanted to really incorporate as much of actual Minecraft into the story as possible by still making it feel as real as possible. So I've gone with the idea that the universe is sentient [it's the end poem]. And when the universe is ready, it will tear a piece of itself, cradling, forming/remolding and comforting the scared an clueless piece, before releasing it to spawn in a 'player' [the game code creates and places you]. The 'player' is clueless about who they are and the world they're a part of. They are only given 3 parting words from their creator: Go, Live, and Thrive. They are granted a few 'gifts'. The ability to gather materials and 'unlock' recipes, and a limited dimensionsal storage they can pull from. [This makes for some possible HILARIOUS moments. Imagine Garroth finding Aphmau in the mines, and she's pulling out/showing him all the ores/resources she gathered, and he's just starting in abject horror, concern, and fascination over just how MUCH she's carrying and omg how strong is she???] I just like to think that Aphmau is their resident cryptid, and with the backstory/Garroth-Aphmaus first meeting, it makes for an even more hilarious scenario.

So, for example, if a character wants to make bread, they'd have to harvest the wheat, go through the actual process of preparing and baking it to get bread. But for Aphmau, all she has to do is go to a workbench/crafting table and lay her materials down. No one else can see it but her, but there are sigils hidden naturally in the wood. Her mind works like the player recipe book, and as long as she has the correct amount/a surplus, it'll become 'available'. She can shift the wheat across the table in their correct correlation (or until the sigils start to 'glow') and get bread when the sequence is completed. Now, the bread doesn't taste AS good as baked bread, but it's still pretty good. But that's a skill special to HER (and maybe the divine warriors to a lesser extent???) Cue everyone being surprised and concerned cause "how did you do that?" "I didn't even know that was possible!" "The tables cursed"

[petalsscribbles]

9. in the middle of the night

If Yn were to describe his sleeping habits in the popular bird terminology, he would clasify himself as a slightly neurotic offspring of a night owl and an early bird. He goes to sleep late and wakes up early on most nights. Sometimes anxiety induced insomnia robs him off his already alarmingly short sleep.

Tonight is not one of those nights when thoughts run around in his brain like a hamster in his tiny plastic wheel, doubts screech and bang two huge cymbals together and worries hold a techno rave.

It's one of those nights where a single sentence haunts him like a ghost, like a shameful secret.

Because you're already in love with someone else.

Well.

Is he?

Yn tried not to dwell on it, mostly because he doesn't want to think about it and figure out Seunghwan was right. The reality of it evokes a lot of ifs. Yn doesn't like ifs, especially what ifs. But he couldn't help himself, and now he's dangerously close to the possibility of having feelings for Matthew.

Matthew... His best friend, his soulmate and proclaimed platonic husband. He's someone Yn can't afford to lose and admiting to himself he likes Matt could cost him their precious bond.

He wishes he could talk to Matthew about this. He's the emotionally intelligent one while Yn is absolutely dense. Matt always helps him make sense of his emotions, guides him through them. He understands him like nobody else, better than Yn understands himself. But Matt is the last person he can talk to about this.

Yn turns on his side, as if a new position would somehow trigger his sleep switch inside his brain. Something much different happens.

Matt is tossing and turning, sweating, mumbling distraught pleas.

Yn sits by his side and shakes Matthew's shoulders.

"Wake up." He whispers and shakes with a bit more force.

Matthew wakes up with a yelp and fear in his eyes. He looks around frantically, still not quite grounded in the real word.

"It's okay. You had a nightmare but I woke you up. You're alright now." Yn comforts as he caresses Matthew's hair. As his eyes meet Yn's, last traces of terror vanish and his shoulders relax. He shuffles forward, wrapping his arms around Yn's chest, face burried in the crook of Yn's neck.

"Thank God you're okay." Matthew says, warm breath tickling Yn's collarbone.

"Of course I am, why wouldn't I be?" Yn reassures, hands soothing Matthew's still slightly trembling body. "Was the nightmare about me?"

Matthew releases a shaky exhale.

"Yes." He says as he pulls away slightly, arms still secured around Yn. "All my nightmares are about you. That's why I called you whenever I had one. To make sure you're alright."

"You should have told me. I could've climbed into your room."

"And make you risk breaking all your bones? No way." He rejects right away.

"You always did it for me." Yn argues.

"Yeah, but unlike you I can actually climb without snapping my neck." He argues back, flicking Yn's forehead to assert his point. Yn rubs the sore spot, unknowingly pouting. If only he knew what that face did to Matthew's heart.

"Let's get back to bed. We have to get up early." He suggests and guides Yn to his bed. Yn just watches him as Matthew basically tucks him in, wondering how can someone like him exist in this world. It should be Yn taking care of him, but Matthew has always put the needs of others before his own.

"Are you really okay now?" Yn asks as he sits up, mostly to reassure himself.

"Yes, don't worry." He smiles. "You're here with me, that's all I need."

Yn lies down with a thud, staring at the cracked ceiling.

Here comes the hamster wheel, the cymbals and the rave, now joined by a loud parade of ifs.

A/n: the amount of times i googled words to cofirm they mean what i think they mean is ridiculous

taglist OPEN comment/ send ask to be added

@xavi-in-kpopland @starchasing-cryptid @tarotarosung @bubblztaro @gnusihcom @monstaxpuppy @academiq @molanran @teoluvsyou @zhaegon @asherthehimbo @letolucas @rickyshen-luvr @xiaoquanquans @desafortuno

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[crypt1dcorv1dae]

I love okarun so much cus like we don't know WHY exactly he was bullied as a little kid (there's many possible reasons we can make assumptions but we just dontnknow for a fact yet) but that bullying is what pushed him towards the occult as an interest, wanting to find some solace in aliens and cryptids, and that interest probably became ANOTHER reason people bullied him, in an endless cycle of:

ostracized for who you are => find comfort in unusual interests => ostracized for being "weird" => pushed further towards those unusual interests

On and on until someone gives enough of a damn to show interest in who he is as a person, even just for a moment

[hippopotamusdreamer]

They Were Roommates

genre. [C][F][A][AU]

warnings. None! Maybe a "damn" thrown in there

additional notes. Female! Reader | You/Your pronouns, not proofread lol

pairing. Yang Jeongin x Reader

w.c. 962

a/n. This is for Fall Cryptid season!

Kpop Masterlist

Fandom Masterlist

Fall Cryptid List

You had a poltergeist problem.

Well, not really a poltergeist, it was a ghost. But you couldn’t very well say a spooky silly ghost problem because then you’d just look and sound ridiculous.

It started when you moved into a new apartment a at the beginning of the year. Rent was cheap and the housing market was the bane of your existence. It didn’t matter that someone was murdered there 10+ years ago in the heat of passion. Or that the previous owners felt like they were being watched. Which was weird because the unit was on the third floor.

And so what if you heard footsteps outside of your bedroom at like three in the morning? Who cares that all your cabinet doors were left open after you’d left for work more than once. And that chill in the air in the middle of the night? Let’s just say that the money you saved during the summer was enough to make you turn a blind eye to everything. Especially now that it was October and the autumn air was settling in.

But the one thing you’d never thought about? It never even came to mind as a possibility of happening.

A ghost getting fed up with your bullshit, so much so that he decided to APPEAR in front of you while you were crying on your couch because of your ex. And just to be clear, you were not crying because he dumped you (you dumped him). You were just so relieved that he was out of your life that the tears just wouldn’t stop coming after that.

“Are you seriously crying over that piece of shit?” An exasperated voice chastised you.

“W-what?” You hiccupped while looking up. Before you stood a transparent being. Sharp eyes that just screamed that they were judging you, and reasonably fashionable for a ghost.

“I’ve watched you day in and day out suffering at being tied down to that absolute shitshow of a guy. And now that you’ve finally gotten rid of him, I find you crying over him! Make it make sense.”

“I’m not crying over him!”

He gave you what could only be the ghost equivalent of a “Sure Jan” look.

“I’m not!”

“What are you crying for?”

The silence in the room was deafening until it wasn’t.

“OH MY-!”

“PLEASE! I SWEAR!!”

What was your life right now? Arguing with your resident ghost over you ex? A ghost that doesn’t even help you pay reeeeent to make matters worse!

“Why am I being attacked right now!?” you cried out pitifully.

“Y/N, you don’t need him in your life. Get a grip…”

“I know that! I don’t know how many times I keep telling you that I’m not crying over him.”

“Then…why are you crying?”

“I don’t…cause I’m relieved? I don��t know, I just know that it feels like a weight is off my shoulders now that he’s gone. I don’t have to walk on eggshells whenever he’s near anymore. I can finally breathe again.”

You could feel yourself relaxing into your couch now, now that this pressure was gone. You blinked and the ghost was gone from in front of you. Though from the noises coming from the kitchen behind you, you knew he didn’t go far.

From your peripheral, you could see him coming to you slowly.

‘What are you doing?” you asked with no intentions of turning to look.

“Shush, this takes a lot of concentration…”

Narrowing your eyes at his words, that did make you want to see what he was doing. “Wha…?”

“Shh…!”

“Now, hold on—”

“Wait!”

The comedic series of events was astounding. You finally decided to turn to you ghost man. Only for him to, you guess, loose concentration. And the ending result? The mug of water he was apparently bringing to you just fell out of his grip and landed all over you and the floor below you. Cue your ghost standing there like he was about to call his mom and tell her he just frew up.

Neither of you said anything as you stared down at the wet mess. At least it was water and not something hot you supposed.

“Damn Y/N, you’re so clumsy.”

You couldn’t say anything coherent, just squawked, flabbergasted at his audacity to try to put the blame on you. Then the laughing started. Laughing at the entire ordeal. Not just the water but actually meeting the ghost that haunted your apartment and not running for the hills immediately.

From the small smile on your ghost’s face, you guessed he was just trying to get you to do something other than cry your eyes out that night. Even if your clothes where caught in the crossfire.

“So, you know my name. What’s yours?” You sighed while standing to go grab something to clean up the mess.

“…Why should I tell you?”

“You literally just threw water at me. You owe me that much.”

His lips puckered knowing you had him there. After a few beats he said, “It’s Jeongin.”

“Jeongin?”

“…Yeah.”

You were too busy cleaning the floor to notice how misty eyed a ghost could get; but you were able to catch the change in his demeanor.

“What’s wrong?” You briefly glanced up at him from your crouched position as you mopped up the water with a used towel. He chewed on his bottom lip before answering.

“…It’s just been a long time since someone’s said my name out loud.”

You felt a pang in your heart at his words. Nodding, you went back to cleaning.

“Then I’ll be sure to call for you every day, Jeongin.”

“…Ok.”

And if it sounded like he was gonna cry, well you weren’t going to bring any attention to it.

This in no way reflects the actual persons involved/based in this fic, nor their actual character. This is purely fiction.

© hippopotamusdreamer, est 2024. all rights reserved.

[kelliealtogether]

I'm hoping to have one last fic typed up, edited, and posted by the end of 2024, but as the year is winding down, I figured I'd post a wrap-up of the works I've completed this year. So here they are, from longest to shortest. 😌

In Comes the Tide - 45k - Rated T

Performing a simple, polite gesture should not result in a marriage, but—Adam Parrish learned—this did not apply to selkies. The summer before his senior year at Harvard, Adam returns to the same small coastal town where he's spent the past two summers. Bussing tables isn't what he wants to do with his life, but the dockside seafood shack where he works is popular, and the tips the employees split pad his bank account enough to afford a more leisurely fall when he gets back to Cambridge. Little does Adam know he's in for a very surprising summer when a selkie shows up at The Sea Shanty and Adam saves his coat...

While There's Breath in My Body - 11k - Rated E

Adam Parrish had lived in Port Royal for twenty years. He’d been around ships for almost two thirds of his life. In all that time, only one ship ever raised the hair on his arms each time it came to port, and it was not the ship itself, but the man who stood at its helm. A skirmish could put a ship’s fate in someone else’s hands. A storm or a cannon ball could put it at the bottom of the sea. A rampant illness could leave it crewless and adrift, waiting for the next enterprising group of sailors to come on board. But a particular flag, a particular captain… Those raised Adam’s hair far more than any combination of masts, sails, and anchors ever would.

A Pirate AU

Hello, I'm in Delaware - 7k - Rated G

Has anyone ever told you that you look like a fed?” “I am a fed.” “And it’s disgusting how much you don’t hide it.” Adam Parrish travels the country covering up sightings of dreamt cryptids. When he gets called to Delaware to investigate a creature caught on home security footage, he asks for some help from a dreamer. His fiancé, Ronan Lynch.

The Magician Entertainment - 5k - Rated G

When Adam Parrish reveals he knows sleight of hand at a company team building event, he doesn't realize how big of a mistake he's made until one of his colleagues corners him a few days later in the office kitchen. The entertainment Declan Lynch hired for his daughter's birthday party bailed, and Declan has ideas about who can fill that void: Adam. Adam agrees — simply because Declan offers him the easiest $500 Adam will ever earn — though Adam's not happy about it. It's only when he arrives at the party that he realizes he might be able to perform some actual magic. With Declan's younger brother, Ronan.

Just Coffee - 4k - Rated G

The new barista at Fox Way Cafe was hot as shit. Or Ronan Lynch hoped he was new. That was the only reasonable excuse why the barista sucked at barista-ing and seemed to provide the fucking worst customer service known to man. The way the guy’s thin smile faltered when he asked someone how he could help them said he’d rather throw himself into an active volcano — or possibly a tiny metal pitcher of freshly steamed milk, given the setting — than take another order for a nonfat pumpkin spice peppermint patty latte with almond milk or whatever, but damn, Ronan would stand in line all day if it meant watching the new guy epically fail at providing a good customer experience. Ronan Lynch doesn't mean to become a regular at Fox Way Cafe, but when he sees the cafe's newest employee for the first time, he decides to keep going back again, and again, and again. At least until the new barista learns how to spell his name...

Rock Beats Scissors - 2k - Rated M

Really, if they wanted to keep things fair and equitable, they could have found some impartial way to make the decision. Flipping a coin. Drawing straws. Rolling a die. But being distractingly hard didn’t always allow for rational thinking, and for two eighteen-year-old boys who appreciated the more physical aspects of life, neither of them would have been willing to hit the pause button to scramble out of bed and find a quarter or an old board game. They just kept going until someone gave in, and no matter who put what where, they both ended up exceedingly happy with the results. Which worked. Until the first time neither of them wanted to give in. When Adam and Ronan can't agree on who's going to top, they solve their problem the old fashioned way: rock paper scissors.

The Singular Formula - 2k - Rated G

It was because he spent his nights on Adam’s floor awake that Ronan heard Adam talk in his sleep in the first place, and though he might not have remembered when he first heard Adam sleep talking, Ronan would never forget what Adam said. Seal off the wall. Don’t let the submarines in. When Ronan starts sleeping over at Adam's tiny apartment above St. Agnes, he learns something about Adam he hadn't known before: Adam talks in his sleep.

Safe Bet - 1k - Rated G

The guy tilted his head slightly as if to say fair, and he lifted a long, lovely hand to push a lock of dusty hair back off his forehead as he looked at Ronan. “I might be, but I hope not.” One corner of his thin lips twitched, then he said, “Because I have a proposition.” Ronan stared. Blinked. He had not anticipated his evening taking this kind of turn when he’d needed to get out of his older brother’s apartment. Ronan loved his brothers Declan and Matthew — who he’d come to stay with while he tried to make his life less directionless — but sometimes three Lynches under one roof was too much. Evenly, he said, “A proposition.” When Ronan Lynch is approached by a hot stranger at a bar, the last thing he expects is that he'll be drawn into the guy's scheme to win a bet against his coworkers.

I've got tons of pots simmering on my stove going into 2025, so here's to another year of writing about these two idiot assholes falling in love over and over again. 🥰